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| Pâ•qidꞋ Yi•rᵊmᵊyâhꞋu |
2000.06.26 The Jerusalem Post, 2000.06.23, p. B9 – "… Rutgers sociologist and self-described feminist Debra Renee Kaufman interviewed 150 ba•al•atꞋ-tᵊshuv•âhꞋ, most of them veterans of the women’s movement and the sexual revolution for her book Rachel’s Daughters…
"Rather than the strictures of úÌåÉøÈä Judaism being something that these women had to overcome on the road to religious observance, they are all quick to point out that ‘the most valued part of their lives has to do with their lives as women within Jewish orthodoxy.’
"Not one expressed any doubts about her ‘theological equality in Orthodox Judaism’ or doubts that she is as ‘capable and worthy of spiritual bonding with [Ël•oh•imꞋ] as men are.’ Upon entering the Orthodox community, these women found themselves for the first time members of a community in which the traditional ‘feminine virtues’ – modesty, the centrality of home and family, sharing rather than competing – are those emphasized by the society at large. As a consequence, they are ‘able to make demands on men as husbands and fathers in ways they believe less possible in the secular world.’
"Orthodoxy empowers them, they said.
"’Before I became Orthodox,’ one woman told Kaufman, ‘I was male-identified. You know: what’s male is better. Not in Judaism. If anything, it is a bit reversed.’
"Orthodox women engage in a daily round of communal activities dominated by other women. Many find that their female friendships are deeper than in the past because they no longer ‘compete with one another for men’s attention.’
"One teacher of the laws of family purity reports that many secular Jewish women are ‘brought to tears by the thought of a society in which every move is not subject to the lens of male appraisal, and where they may be truly free to be themselves.’
"Even the laws of family purity, with their mandated periods of sexual separation and coming together, are experienced positively.
"’The family purity laws are so in line with me as a woman… [I]t is commanded that I not be sexually taken for granted, that I have two weeks each month for myself,’ one woman told Kaufman.
"Going to the ritual baths, these women feel ‘connected to history and other women.’ Because their intimate lives are wholly reserved to a private domain, Kaufman discovered, ‘the ba•al•atꞋ-tᵊshuv•âhꞋ seem to stimulate and deepen their sense of sexuality.’ After decades of marriage, Orthodox women still report experiencing the excitement of new brides upon returning from the ritual bath.
"In a Los Angeles Times first-person feature story, a former “Cosmo girl” describes her Orthodox wedding:
"’After the ceremony, before the dancing…, Aaron and I went to a separate room to spend a few private moments. There, he held my hand for the first time. That small gesture had a richness and intimacy I could never have imagined.’”
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